Cancer Testing Faith?

Cancer tested my faith during high school; I went through the first trauma I could ever be in. I would go unconscious several times during the day that lasted for around 20 days. Finally, I was rushed to the hospital to figure out the issue and “solve” it. This issue took constant doctors’ visits for five months. Lastly, a certain issue showed up where I was sent to the ultra sound department where it was overflowing with expecting women waiting their babies check up tests. I was insanely shocked! Why would I be here? What’s going on? I felt embarrassment, humiliation and fear. I was simply traumatized with where I was. Everyone wondering what a teenage girl would be doing in such department; throwing questions at me concerning pregnancy; gender, birth due and pregnancy complications… if I had any. I had to scream “STOP”. When my turn finally came, the doctor started examining the issue as my parents were standing aside with worried looks, shivering hands and soul fear. The doctor looked around, whispered, leaving the room afterwards. We finally reached home as I saw my parents whispering with nerves wrecked and eyes tearing as they throw the killer word “cancer”. I stood still with all strength but yet felt paralyzed, traumatized and heated; I wanted to explode, shout and deny this word exists. I cried secretly, my mother spoke to me about the issue. I learned that I had two tumors in my right ovary with the possibility of being cancer tumors. I settled down, loosened up and decided to think clearly rather than falling apart. I thought surgery if I was accurately diagnosed and chemo therapy, definitely no wait. But afterwards I had to fall again when I thought of losing my hair, physical strength and my active life. I prayed, approached my religion until I forgot my possible cancer disease. I though better and optimistically to fight the battle with all strengths. When I went for my final check up test, I was afraid but yet ready for my battle. The doctor started, again looked around, shocked but spoke this time…”the tumors are gone, disappeared”. He checked the ultra sound machine for any confusion or if was broken. After new studies and examinations it was finally revealed to be a different issue that is related to active hormones and not cancer or tumor. I owned the universe in that moment. I couldn’t believe I have my life, strength, optimism, faith and courage to fight anything unwelcomed in my life. My faith was extreme; a priority and a path for my life ahead. Never lose optimism and never assume terrible scenarios.

I’m well, pleased and grateful

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